Hello Dear Readers,
It’s been a while, I know. I’m sorry for my absence. Things have been going on and I’m sure you know how that is. Stuff piling up, everything just sort of accumulates and you tell yourself there’s time. You’ll do it later! Only you look up and somehow six months has flown by and you’ve got nothing to show for it.
I haven’t been writing much fiction lately, either… And, as those of you follow me on Twitter or have friended me on Facebook are aware, I haven’t been posting nearly as much as of late.
I’ve been gone, but hopefully not forgotten…
But now it’s time for me to get my head back in the game, so to speak. In order for me to do that, I took some time to really think about what I hoped to achieve with my writing career in mind. It helps to have clear goals and a clear vision of what you’re working for, after all.
So I broke it down by topic. I asked myself, honestly, how I felt about each of the below topics. For some of them, my answers were instantaneous, for others, I had to do some serious soul searching.
Do I want to be famous? No, not really. I mean, sure it would be cool to be at a convention 5, 10, maybe 15 years from now, be it as a guest or an attendee, and someone comes up to me with a battered copy of So Long And Thanks For All The Brains or Here Be Clowns and asks me to sign it with shaking hands… But I am not seeking to be the next Anne Rice.
Do I want to be rich? Honestly, no. I don’t. Don’t get me wrong, like everyone else I’ve had daydreams about ditching the day job forever and doing what I want with my time, but rarely do those day dreams feature mansions, maids, butlers, or any other such finery. My dream car is a 2 door 1998 RAV4 convertible, for chrissakes. I don’t exactly have expensive tastes. Well, unless you count books or sushi… But even then, no. I have no real desire to be wealthy. My real greatest desire in regards to money is to be comfortable, debt free, and able to provide for my family in case of emergency. Other than that, it’s all cake.
Do I want to win awards? Sure, as long as I’ve earned them. I think it’s far more important that my writing meet my standards, that myself and my fans enjoy it, and that it’s something I want to do, and want to keep doing. I won’t turn down any Stoker nominations, but I won’t go kissing anyone’s ass to get one, either. I’ll do my best to turn out enjoyable, well written works and hope that they speak for themselves.
Do I want to write as a full time job? Well, now. This is the question I labored over the most. At the end of all that churning, roiling thought, my answer has to be no. No, I do not want to write as a full time job. The primary reason for that is that I do not ever want writing to be something I do because someone else tells me I have to. The moment that happens, the joy of it has been diminished. I want to write because I feel inspired, because something caught my eye and made me think, because I need to let the demons in my head come out and play for a while, but not because some publisher has me by the short and curlies. I do hope to finish at least one novel as well as another novella or two and a plethora of short stories, but I want to do it according to my own schedule and my own motivation.
So I guess at the end of the day, I’m going to keep doing what I’ve been doing: Writing, dreaming, and hoping for the best. And I hope you’ll be there with me. Reading.